#019: hey 2022, I really liked you

the story
“I’m just so, so proud of you.”

My bestie and I teared up over our FaceTime call last weekend — her in Johannesburg, me in Brooklyn. Due to the nature of our busy schedules, we hadn’t been able to connect in over two months and this had been our time to catch each other up on allllll the things. It sparked a lot of reflection for the both of us on just how much had changed this year. In short: we had come a very long way.

I set so many intentions for myself in the beginning of 2022. Building community, strengthening my boundaries, consistently moving my body, fitness activations, making career moves. As I gave her the SOTU on my life as of late, it became clear that I’d accomplished way more than I’d even realized.

2022 was by far the best year I’ve had since 2017 (gawd, that’s a long stretch). I wholeheartedly believe it was because for the first time in a long time, I set out to choose myself in every way. I spoke up, I advocated, I went after what I wanted without shame. I made time for the things I enjoyed and moved my body in ways that felt good on a regular basis. I learned to hold my boundaries, and didn’t let the few people who were on BS make it that far into my life. I started not one but two projects — 20Something Stories and my own barre classes — with an unwavering level of support from my friends and family that I will never stop being grateful for. I made more new friends than I could’ve ever dreamed of, and I pivoted to a career path that I really see myself going far in. Now that’s just the list off the top of my head. As mother dearest would say, I “did the damn thang.”

This year was pivotal for me. It was loaded with discomfort but only because it was time for me to shift, change, and let go of so much that had been holding me down. I spent a lot of time alone, and that was really good for me too. The result? I finally created a life I love and have a mindset that's rooted in the notion that life is always happening for me, never against me. There’s no better feeling than that.

the lesson

As good as it was, this year wasn’t without tons of lessons. Here are my top ten that I learned along the way:

  • Fear and impostor syndrome will always be there, at some point I have to power through it to reach my goals and stop overthinking.

  • Stepping out of my comfort zone and being confident in myself go hand in hand, though doing more of the former has helped me build up a ton more of the latter.

  • Half the battle is working up the courage to voice my boundaries, the other half is not letting anyone gaslight me about them once I do.

  • Discipline, consistency and routine are not only the best for my success, but my overall wellbeing too.

  • Sometimes taking a break from a person makes you realize that life is much easier without them.

  • The gut feelings I had about men were always right, and my intuition was going nuts for a reason. If I don’t feel mentally and physically safe, he ain’t the one.

  • It really, truly does not matter what anyone else thinks about me as long as I’m right within myself.

  • I have great ideas — there’s no need to be shy about them.

  • Losing a friend is hard, but gaining more than I could count this year reminded me that life goes on and there is no shortage of incredible people in this world.

  • Being alone on purpose and focusing solely on me was the key to unlocking the most peaceful version of myself that I’ve ever experienced.

the light

It’s been an amazing year, not because there weren’t many challenges, but because I made it one. It felt like one big drastic shift after another that ultimately showed me who the f*ck I really was. Quite honestly, I’m a vastly different woman than I was at the beginning of 2022 and I am so over the moon about it. It all started with a mindmap full of intentions and a vision board. Now I’m living a life I love, that I’m so proud of and grateful for. Currently, it feels like it can’t get much better than that, but I know it will because it always does.

This is my last story of the year y’all, and I’m so thankful for each and every one of you who’s read and supported each week. Ya girl has been exhausted lately, so I’m going to take a much needed holiday break, but I promise I’ll be back next year with all new stories. In the meantime, if you have any feedback or topics you want me to cover in 2023, reply to this email and let me know!

Until next year everyone. Happy Holidays ❤️